The
appraisal time razzmatazz in any salaried setup is the most buzzing event of the
year. Not so much in the government/public sector scenario perhaps, as those
setups are being driven primarily by the pay commission concepts but in a
typical corporate/private sector setup it’s no less than an action packed, high
voltage TV drama.
So like
with any good, popular and a successful drama series the appraisal drama also
has a few protagonists in the form of ‘
Suddenly invisible but loaded with some unbelievably irritating facts, Manager
aka Villain’ , ‘Highly hopeful and self-proclaimed
best performer, Employee aka Hero’ and a ‘ I know you well, stop faking, friend/colleague aka Joker’. And then
with such a startling star cast there ought to be some good plots as well to
complement the former. So we also have some interesting plots as well in the
form of – ‘Plan as never before and shut
the yuck out of the manager, plot’, ‘Manager
goes missing, plot’, ‘Promote me and
who else, plot’, ‘Double digit hike
is a minimum, plot’, ‘ You decline, I
resign plot’ and if it’s an IT setup we have an added attraction in the
form of ‘Now, at least send me to onsite, plot’.
So let’s breeze through each of these
plots and how these protagonists fare in these plots.
‘Plan as never before
and shut the yuck out of the manager, plot’. The main protagonist of this plot is
‘Highly hopeful and self-proclaimed best performer,
Employee aka Hero’. So although there is still about 3-4 months to the appraisal
process kick off, the hero plans hard well in advance. He collates all kinds of
appreciations from his key stakeholders, he tries and goes beyond the normal
call of the duty and makes his presence felt everywhere, he for sure picks
those pieces of work that everyone else in the team hates to work, he even
stretches his back to work late hours and on weekends, all with a plan to nail
it down in the final showdown. So much so that he even rehearses and equips
well for all the what if scenarios
that the villain might come up with in the final combat. All this while the Joker
keeps on motivating the hero to continue with his approach and when not around
he also laughs out loud on his hyper active cynicismsJ.
‘Manager goes missing,
plot’. So all
this while when the hero is planning, plotting and getting ready for the final
showdown through all kinds of attention seeking gimmicks, the villain all of a
sudden disappears, not literally though, but in the most funny ways. When our hero
proactively participates and drives lot of initiatives to catch Manager’s eye,
the villain turns a blind eye to it, as if he has hardly noticed this much
anticipated pro activity. And while the hero has been busy planning perfectly,
the villain is on his own is taking note of all the weird things that would go
on to haunt the villain in the final showdown. Expectedly so the Joker keeps
giving some false hopes to the hero by comforting him with those hypothetical
acknowledgments from the villain that he has actually never ever given J.
‘Promote me and who else,
plot’. So finally comes the D day, the day of final showdown. The hero enters,
all well prepared, well equipped with a strong script in mind covering all the
good and oh so good things he has done throughout the year which will
eventually win him all the cash cows of the year. The manager aka villain on
other hand comes equally prepared (much to the dismay of the hero), having done
a crash course on company policy and being well briefed on the company’s
financial guidance for the year, all this without an amicable expression on his
face, at times even with a disgusted one. So when the hero starts his well-rehearsed
winning narrative to take it to the zenith and claim for the ‘Promotion’ reward,
the villain seems disinterested, almost to the point of being inattentive. And
when the hero starts getting a bit restless, the villain throws up his ‘lack of
quota card’ this year due to relatively challenging year for the company. This
not only stumps the hero big time, even takes him off guard for a while. Joker
however, who has already faced it all in his previous encounters, enjoys this anti-climax
to the hilt.
‘Double digit hike is
a minimum, plot’. Bruised, but not lost, the hero resorts to his
Plan B and asks for a double digit hike for all the good things he has done
throughout the year. And almost as if he is obliging the villain by taking the
bitter pill of not getting promoted this year demands for a fat double digit
hike that he is pretty much worthy of. The villain now comes to the front foot,
diplomatically acknowledging hero’s efforts, hailing him as a senior member of
the team and then smartly bracketing all these exceptional efforts under the minimum
expectation bucket. After all a senior member of the team is expected to do
much moreJ. So
the double digit demand also goes for a toss, though in turn the wicked villain
tries obliging the hero by comforting him saying, despite nothing exceptional
from your end I will still and push our case with the higher management, just
as a personal favour.
‘ You decline, I resign
plot’. By now, the hero has already had enough. All these months where he was
harping the hopes of getting promoted and grabbing a fat hike through his well-planned
efforts, the villain has put all his plans in disarray. With a sense of frustration
he throws up his trump card and threatens to resign for being not rewarded for
his best in class performances and unparalleled efforts in the team. The
villain being a seasoned campaigner tries to cool him down and advices him to
not act hastily and rather think again. And promises him that any which way he
will still try and do something for the hero. Joker finds this moment of rage
and false assurance ever so familiar and fittingly hilariousJ.
‘Now, at least send me
to onsite, plot’. The hero by now has lost it, he is dejected,
shattered and broken. All his well-planned dreams have been broken by an
experienced game player who is a pro at this. However, being in the IT setup
there is also an additional carrot that serves equally good as a good hike or
grade promotion and that is onsite.
So the hero throws his last dice and negotiates with the villain for a quick
fix onsite movement as a probable alternative and a supposed reward for his self-proclaimed
beyond best in class performance throughout the year. Manager aka villain being
an seasoned player instantly agrees to it and asks him to be assured of his
onsite movement sooner than later. The Hero comes out with some sense of
accomplishment, the villain feels good about his ever so well executed ways and
Joker being a joker in the pack just laughs out loud J.
It’s a different
matter though that by the time the hero eventually gets travel ready, the next appraisal
cycle is on his head and he has to forego his next promotion/double digit hike
as well as a trade-off for his last years promised onsite travel J. So more often than not the villain
has the last laugh, unless of course if the hero in consideration is lucky,
licky or just way too good to be ignored and maneuvered J.
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kin…
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