Wednesday, March 31, 2010
The Curious Case of Miss Mirza!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Temptation Thrills but often Kills!
That temptation of using the credit card to avail the end of season sale against a strong promise to oneself about not using the credit card by any means to curb on the splurging and consolidate my savings every month. But the greedy mind overpowers such ambitious thoughts with justifications like what difference will it make if I spend just 10% of my salary on my luxuries? Am I not worth even such elementary things? Am I working so damn hard just to deposit all my money in the bank? Will I carry all the amount I am saving by living so miserably to heaven, once I die? Obviously NOT, so let me use it one last time. The satisfaction of these preposterous shopping is immense, but it lasts only till the time the credit card bill arrives, because there after you spend the entire time scratching your head trying to figure out the ways through which you can manage the sum to be paid back. Wish I would have never enrolled for a credit card and had some brains to act sensiblyL.
That temptation to wipe off that heavy chocolate bar at midnight just moments before sleeping, inspite of a stern warning from the dentist and mom about the high risk of tooth decay, which are already in a bad state and surviving by means of root canals and cosmetic fillings. But all these preachings are overcome by an inner voice which says ‘ o come on boy, eating it just once can not result in a bacterial attack all of a sudden and thereby eventually decaying my all so innocent teeth’. And the mind succumbs to this temptation and the far fetched consequences are very much on the lines of those preachings which seemed so irritating and hilariously foolish earlier. Wish I would have let go that monstrous chocolate bar and adhered to those golden preachingsL.
That temptation to sleep for just 10 minutes, hours before a scaring college exam, and the argument behind this short nap being that ‘it will refresh me to new levels and I would be able to concentrate better and anyways what difference a 10 minute nap will make when I am smart enough to make up for this time’. But what eventually happens is that you wake up just minutes before the start of the exam and you are on the mercy of either your neighbor or entirely on your luck, praying that only those stuff comes in the exam paper that I have read. But the outcome invariably happens to be other way round, and either the entire exam paper seems to be an out of course stuff or you are caught red handed trying to cheat from your neighbor. Wish I wouldn’t have slept last night and crammed something usefulL.
That temptation to adore, glance and literally scan an X-Ray of every passing irresistible girl, while you are on a date with your girl friend. At such times the harder one tries not to get distracted, the more these beautiful bombs hover around you. And every single time your girl friend catches you red handed, stealing a glance of those beautiful innocent angels. As an aftermath you have to do the damage control by gifting the hitler in your life with the most expensive gifts and lying at length about their goodness and beauty. Wish I could have resisted myself for those few momentsL.
That temptation to eat few spoonfuls of rice at dinner when you are already fighting to reduce that apparently visible tummy. But the rationale which one puts behind this is that 4 or 5 spoonfuls of rice won’t inflate my tummy even by a millimeter and hence why to let this delicious curry get wasted when these few grains of rice can solve the dual purpose of finishing both the curry and the rice at the same time, and anyways one should not waste food in these times of high inflation. But what eventually happens is, in an attempt to not waste that rice for the sake of mankind, one puts on double MRF tyres around his waist as an apparent symbol of obesity. Wish I could have just thought of myself and not about the entire mankind before feeding myself with those oodles of riceL.
That temptation to join a 5 star gym after seeing a Salman Khan movie, which tempts you to flaunt a physique much like the superstar himself. Forcing you to splurge quite a lot of money on enrolment in the gym, buying an expensive track suit and a branded sports shoe costing not less than 3000 bucks. But one month down the line the enthusiasm and the desire to flaunt a Salman Khan physique dies down and you find yourself either sleeping around or feeding yourself with high calorie stuff at your gym hours, the expensive track suits becomes an item of your storage closet and the 3000 bucks sports shoe makes you feel guilty every Friday when you put them on for the casual dressing day in office. Wish I shouldn’t have watched that movie or I should have applied my brains before getting carried away and making fool of myselfL.
That temptation to procrastinate some vital work in office and push it off for tomorrow in lieu of going home early to watch those awe inspiring IPL matches has back fired hundred out of hundred times. Such fanciful thoughts are either butchered by the just in time email from the onsite manager delegating an urgent task minutes before my pack up time or they are eclipsed by those over stretched status calls from the business clients sitting in US. I wonder why the most critical issues crop up on the days of most critical cricket match of the season. Probably the business clients purposefully disrupt the processes on these days so that they can watch these matches at ease at our expense. Wish I could have studied and worked a little harder to be in the shoes of those autocratic managers L.
On one hand our life seems so deliciously attractive amidst such alluring temptations but on the other hand the very moment you fell into these traps, the misery begins. But I still believe the fun lies in prudently falling in these traps and enjoying these temptations to the fullest even if these moments of joy are short lived because when the saints of the stature of Swami Nityanand can't resist the temptations of life, we are even more mortals to resist them, but we should never succumb to these temptations at the expense our moralitiesJ!
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Wednesday, March 17, 2010
From Dayawati to MALAWATI!
In the early days when people talked of this lady, they talked with a touch of sympathy for her. The very reason for those soft feelings being her rise from a low caste chamaar background woman to a well deserved, hard working graduate in the fields of law and education and thereon from being a low profile school teacher to a defiant political leader working and fighting for the rights and development of dalits. No wonder she has been chosen as the chief minister of the most populous state of the biggest democracy of this planet four times till date, in addition to being the 1st dalit women chief minister of any Indian states. All these feats in this era of 33% women reservation, counts for a lot. She should also be applauded for giving the likes of Mulayam Singhs, Amar Singhs and Kalyan Singhs a good run for their money, who have been breathing on her neck for as long as we can remember. Infact it wont be farce to say Mulayam and her Highness are the Pontings and Sachins or Aamirs and SRKs of the UP politics, always up with the cat and mouse game. Hats off to the lady for her journey from ‘a struggling Dayawati to a defiant Mayawati’.
There was a time in the Indian politics when the political parties ruled the masses just by the virtue of Hindu Muslim sentiments and reaping on the differences arising from these emotionally sensitive issues. It was then, Mayawati under the guidance of her mentor Kanshiram started a campaign for the welfare, upbringing and social upliftment of the weaker sections of the society, the so called dalits and gujjars of UP,
Now some staggering facts about the lady herself which will make the likes of Obamas, Browns and Sarkozys who are taking their countries from strengths to strengths in terms of development, blush beyond limits. Under Maya Memsaab’s tenure over 9000 farmers were robbed of their lands, on the name of Yamuna Expressway, I believe all of them must be high net worth farmers and certainly not the oppressed and the dalit ones. Madam’s past birthday’s have all been big hits with the media, where madam appeared laden with diamonds, accepting gifts in front of live media and in the background party goons were all busy in their extortion spree from the common man forcing them to contribute in cash on the occasion of Madam’s birthday. When questioned on this, madam roared back, ‘it’s the aam aadmi’s way of showering there love on me’, wish even I had some friends who atleast remembered wishing me on my birthday leave apart giving me such exorbitant aam aadmi giftsL. Another feather on Maya Memsaab’s distinguished cap is that she is been accused of ordering her MPs to contribute their discretion funds to party fund illegally (read the next sentence twice guys) and subsequently ‘Madam paid more income tax than industrialist and forbes listed Mukesh Ambani in the assessment year 2007-08’, now someone please tell me the procedure to get recruited in the Bahujan Samaaj Party, I can go kill for such a job profile, it is also recession proof in true senseJ. If all this wasn’t enough the 73 kilo heavy weight still has the outrageous courage to erect 100s of elephant statues and 1000s of her own statues in various memorial parks across the state costing over a whooping Rs. 2000 crores to the state. Over that she has the guts to deploy special police force to protect these statues fearing that the opposition might demolish them, thereby further stretching that Rs 2000 crore figure. Following all this I really feel pity on myself, because my fiancĂ© won’t even allow me to get a Rs. 150 pencil sketch done for myself leave apart dedicating even 1 statue for me, at times I really love Maya more than my fiancĂ©L. One might face real constipation digesting this heavy duty shameful stuff, but this lady is never done, she always has something more up her sleeves. On the occasion of the 25th anniversary celebrations of her political party, she was felicitated with a massive Rs. 10 crore currency garland made up of 1000 rupee note, instantly turning into a ‘MALAWATI’. In addition to this garland show, a Rs 200 crore mass rally to celebrate the occasion. Adding to the mockery, the furious opposition demanded an immediate enquiry and a high level probe on this money might show, in retaliation Maya the illusionist ordered for a CBI probe against a malicious honey bee attack on her and her party workers during her high profile rally. Now can you beat that? J
It is hard to comprehend the motive of such politicians because people are dying without food, good grains are rotting in godowns and Mayawati is busy garlanding herself. Just days back she shamelessly refused to give the victims of temple stampede their due compensation stating that the state is broke and out of funds and Centre should come in for rescue, I wonder how did she manage the Rs 200 crore rally or Rs 10 crore garland or those Rs 2000 crore worth of elephant and self statues? Are they worth more than those sorry lives or is it a brazen exhibition of power? In a state where 65% of the people have not even seen, touched or spent a thousand rupee note all their lives, is this a big joke on all those poor people who have elected these bunch of insane politicians to rule them or do we really deserve such rulers as a punishment for wrongly exercising our biggest right (right to vote). I have always failed to understand why and how people re-elect such people again and again but every time I have consoled myself saying that the people of my country are smarter than these politicians and they endorse the fact that ‘Bullshit is also a very good fertilizer’ and in a set of bad alternatives always choose the least worse to minimize the damageJ.
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Monday, March 8, 2010
Do we really deserve a Men's Day?
The build up to Women’s Day this year has been quite baffling for me. Lots of emails floating in the office emphasizing on the importance and existence of a Woman and also about the mega celebrations on the Women’s Day, including activities like ethnic fashion show and tempting and free sumptuous snacks to name a few but all with a disclaimer of ‘ For Women Only’, as if it has been deliberately planned to outcast people like me who are more than interested in both the fashion show and free sumptuous snacks. If this wasn’t enough the moment I entered my office this morning, I was in a fix that whether I have entered a wrong place or what, because I was totally misled by the soothing smell of 100’s of exotic perfumes and deodorants, forcing me to believe that I have mistakenly entered the banquet hall of Hotel Taj Krishna but for the same boorish expression on the building's security guard's face which made me realize that I am very much in the same place, I visit daily. Moments later I was again confused to find myself in a Ladies Sangeet gathering, but for their ID cards, the women all around were all heavily clad in none less than bridal saarees, overtly laden with truck loads of glittering jewelery and with atleast 3 extra layers of make up than usual, painted on their slightly familiar faces. Somehow I garnered little strength and tried to strategically place myself besides two other guys waiting for the elevator, who were also looking equally shocked,oppressed and frightened by the in flavor attitude of Women's Day. Now to add to our fury the elevator door opened and we found three equally over dressed prospective brides on the other side of the door, one of them was reading the Women's Day special edition of The Times of India and the other two were vociferously discussing the odds of passing of Women Reservation Bill in the parliament. I was anxiously waiting along with the two other pity souls on the edge of the elevator door for our destined floors to come, we were in such a state of petrification that can only be matched by 1st year engineering students in front of their most dreaded seniors, anticipating the cruelest form of ragging. But after probably one of the longest wait of my life the elevator doors opened on my floor and I almost ran to reach to my cubicle seat only to drink one full bottle of chilled water and kept wondering can't this day be an optional holiday for all the non women employees?
All the while I was thinking what bad or what cruel all the men on this planet have done that they don't have a day called 'International Men's Day' celebrating the cause of masculinity or manhood. The maximum the men get is a day called ' Father's Day' but to qualify for that one has to be a father at least. So no luck for young and mis opportune people like me here too. So what could be the reason of no such concept like 'Men's Day' in practice, as against the annually celebrated 'Women's Day'? One reason could be, we the men don't have the stamina and capacity to continuously chat on endlessly and hence we don't qualify for such felicitations. Another reason can be we the men don't have those extra terrestrial wooing powers which the likes of Urmilas and Shakuntalas had which made the likes of staunchest saints and yogis drooling for these ladies, leaving behind all there ethics and beliefs. Another probabilistic reason can be we hardly stand anywhere when it comes to the qualities of beauty and good looks. So with all these follies how can we even dream of a special day dedicated to our fraternity. So there is no point cribbing and getting jealous on the mega celebrations on Women's Day. In this hazy scenario the best we can do is to wish and pray to the almighty god that ' Agle janam mujhe beti hi keejo'.
But on a full on serious note I salute the intensity with which the women all around the world celebrate the concept of Women's Day. I really feel that all the women, be it our mothers, be it our sisters, be it our wives, be it our daughters or be it our house maids, all of them deserve a standing ovation for all the sacrifice, love and care they have given for the well being of the entire mankind. We the men of this planet can not repay this debt by any means, the least we can do is we can minimize this deficit by not harassing these beautiful women by the means of eve teasing, domestic violence or cruel things like dowry demands. The love, the care and the concern which we receive from all these wonderful angels is way beyond our imagination and rather priceless in comparison to any monetary or materialistic substitute we yearn for. We should always give due credence and respect to all the pain a woman bears for us right from the most excruciating pain of all pains, i.e the Labor Pain to the other unbearable mental pains we experience in our lives, just to give us a happy existence all through our lives. Also if there is some love, harmony and peace in today's world its just because of these beautiful princess, otherwise we men are far too carnivorous and blood thirsty to survive the myths and demons of anger, lust, power and pride.
So let us all take a pledge to treat all the women in our lives with utmost love and care and rather place them one pedestal above all the men, keeping aside our inflated male chauvinist egos and join all these beautiful ladies in the celebration of this day not just as a Women's Day but more so as a remembrance for all the sacrifices and act of love and kindness they have continuously bestowed on us. And thanks to all those beautiful women in our lives whose unconditional love and care for us is much deeper than those six layers of multi cosmetic makeups:)
Happy Women's Day!
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Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Are we Unfair to our National Sport?
The state of Hockey and its following is so bad in our country that people aren’t even aware about the rules of the game, leave apart knowing the names of the players in our national team, at best they know about some ‘Dhanraj Pillai’ and a few older and wiser ones might know about ‘Major Dhyanchand’. And it’s a pity that most of us aren’t even aware of the captain of our national team, though the more hockey literate guys can recall him as some Singh, wisely guessing between Singhs and Pillais, as they are the safest bet in the world of Indian Hockey. But thanks to the recent awareness campaign in the media and to Dr Google as well, most of us know Rajpal Singh is the man leading our nation in the Hockey World Cup. Similarly, the administrative setup and the internal politics amongst the officials of Hockey Federation of India is so dirty and cheap that it hardly adds to the progress of the game in our country, no wonder we stand at a distant no.11 in the world stage and we have qualified for the World Cup by the virtue of being the host nation and not on the basis of merit. So with a weak governing body, weaker financial support and a consistently poor string of results by our hockey team in recent times, how can we expect the current generation to follow and support the national team to raging levels? Its not that the current generation is being partial towards Hockey and unnecessarily biased towards other sports. If the support towards other sports is better, its not that it has been achieved overnight, it has been a slow and a gradual process. There was hardly any following for Cricket before 1980’s, only after India won the Cricket World Cup in 1983 and the sport started producing heroes like Sunil Gavaskar, Kapil Dev and Sachin Tendulkar who claimed all the records in the cricketing world and resurrected India as a cricketing super power, that the support and following for the game gained momentum and gradually reached its peak. Similarly the rage for tennis in India wasn’t attained over night either, it was the diligence of the likes of Paes, Bhupathis and Mirzas who kept the tricolor flying high and garnered support from all corners. Same was the build up for the games like shooting, chess, weightlifting and boxing, courtesy the great sportsmen like Rathore, Bindra, Anand and Vijender. The younger generation is watching these mortals sweating it out and turning into immortal heroes by the virtue of their consistency and perseverance. The support and the following for a particular sport are directly proportional to the string of successes, consistency of performances and the level of Iconization related to it. So it would be utterly unfair to blame the current crop of youth for showing no interest towards the game of hockey because I doubt this disinterest will persist if we start winning more often and if we produce world class players like Bindra, Vijender and Tendulkar in the field of Hockey.
Another thing which I find very illogical is the concept called ‘National’. We say Hockey is our National Sport, but by logic and common sense a national game should be the one in which that nation excels and a majority of that nation plays that sport. But is it really the case with our nation? We stand way below on the excellence barometer and Hockey is certainly not the most widely played game in the country either. Understandably, when these national jargons were declared, at that point Indian Hockey was at its zenith, but things do change and evolve with time,
Chak de India, Chak de Hockey!
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